My Day

mhm.. so today everyone went on this field trip to the Japan/China War Memorial Museum. at first,it was kinda boring cuz we had to stand in the cold for so long. but later, when we could go anywhere we wanted, it got better. but omg!inside the museum, there were pics of wat the japanese did to the chinese...oh man it was sooo horrifying. they would carve out their instestines while they r still alive...DUDE THOSE JAPANESE SOLDIERS BACK THEN R SOO CRUEL & HEARTLESS! it hurts to see pics of wat they did. *sign..but history is history. it can be forgiven but it can not be forgotten!

anyways,later it got boring again...so me & some friends snuck away from the group & found this place..omg that place was CREEEPYYY! there was this memorial stone to this dead dude rite next to the rock we were sitting at. & someone kept playing creepy music from her cell. lol, felt like halloween. Anyways..they brought sooo many junk food, damn think im getting fat again ;p

mhm...loneliness still didnt go away..still kinda felt empty even wen i was w/ all those ppl but w/e. it got better. so while they were pigging out on junk food. i left the group & i stood at this place. omg it was sooo amazing. i was rite on top of the highway, so close to it. & there was just all these cars zooming by under me. lol i sound stupid but yea..i had this "moment"

Anyways, ohh something made me happy today tho. so someone bought this paper mini hot air balloon, we are wrote our wishes on there & lit it. took us hella long to get a fucking lighter and hella long to lit it up. omg & in the end, it somehow resulted in a fight between someone & their bf ;p akward.. but you know wat..i had another "moment" as i watched our hot air balloon fly...IT FLEWW SO HIGH TOO ^-^

the ride back home was tiring..ppl in my class r so retarded. was singing this song bout this girl & boy in our class, it goes like this. one person sings" who does *** like" 10 other ppl shout "###" then it goes "who does ### like", more ppl shout "***" & on & on. lol lame but they make me laugh. but seriously , i think this is considered bullying, like picking the fugliest girl in the class & slowest[ as in kinda retarded-ish] dude in the class & constantly teasing em with their stupid songs. aha & the teacher dont even care. i dont think china teachers care bout this sht, its sad -_-

A good thing about today tho, we got out hella early for once. 12:30 ! aha. yay ^-^ so me & my bf went to the park & we just literally sat on a bench for 3 fcking hours just making out & talking. lol. he is soo cute. aha, he's the only person here who can make me laugh & feel truely happy. hehe so today, he actually got down on one knee & make me promise him i'd marry him one day.lol we were playing..or at least i was, but i promised [: ahahha, hella made me laugh cuz he was so cute while he was doing it. & a few ppl kept staring at us cuz i guess we were still wearing uniform. lol we must be hella disgracing our school ;p

oh but heres something i hate about china. wenever u show PDA everyone stares. like wtf, get a life! hella rude, some ppl even go as far as doing a 180 degree headturns while riding their bikes ;p WATCH THE ROAD !

mhm..even tho im not in love yet. But Damn! i am so in infatuation rite now. his kisses are so amazing, & i just love every minute wen im / him. he makes everything better, & everytime i throw a fuss, he's always comfort me by doing all those cute things. today, i got kinda frustrated w/ him, & he actually knelt on the ground in front of me asking me to forgive him. Lol, at the end i couldnt stand to see him kneeling anymore, so yea, aha but grr.. so cute.

I'm glad i found him [: i can talk to him about ANYTHINGG! i swear..nothing is too personal to talk about wen im w/ him. aha & i do tell him almost everything. cept for the empty feeling i feel...i know he won't understand cuz he's never been through it. he's always surrounded by ppl & i know he almost never gets lonely. & plus if i tell him, i'd just make him feel bad...

*sign..whew! that was a long post, aha, but i guess im just in a blabing mood rite now ;D
p.s our four months in 4 days ^-^ he says thats the longest he's ever been in a relationship...mhm..that kinda makes me wonder..lol 7/10/09~???

Random Question: Whats the difference between being in love & loving someone? [im sure im not IN love...but i like him soo much...is it enough to be love?]