My Day

Helluh helluh tired cuz me and my cousin stay up till three a.m every night! its crazy but the ppl in Xing Jiang are famous for sleeping late. The days go by fast so i cant really go into detail so i'll just talk about today.

woke up at 12 then bought some noodles to eat. ppl in this small town is so nice (: um then went to this restraunt to eat, ugh ppl frink helluh here cuz making others drink wine is a way of expressing their affection in XingJiang. it gets annoying tho...then went to my cousin's house again. LOl her dog is helluh cute and its brealy one and it already has a litlle bf. um the adults sat and talked & i felt really bored cuz im never interested in what they say. But becuz of that, they always say im quiet or wat not, it just gets so annoying cuz wtf am i suppose to do if i got nothing to say to u. some of my relatives are okay cuz they dont treat me like a child but others r so annoying. all they do is point out ur flaws, im like screaming shshut up in my head!! okay finnally left her house and went to another restraunt that i went to the other day. it would have been really boring if it wasnt was this waiter...^^ i think he remembered me from the other day so yeah, we started talking cuz something embarrasing happened which gave him a chance to make fun of me T_T he had the cutest smile ever. Then we kinda flirted LOL no biggie tho. i always thought i liked the manly kinda guys but i guess i can go either way? LOl yep. thats my day, & now im at my other cousin's house typing.

Xing Jiang

So...i never realized how complicated chinese funerals can be until i attended my grandpa's. our planning was suppose to be already really really really simple but even that is complicated. first we must go see him in the glass casket thingy? then talk to him then burn some paper. while doing that we have to put a black thing on our arms with this chinese character on it. then at night the guys in the family have to stay with my grandpa the whole night. The girls didnt have to go cuz it was soooo cold. and this had to be done for the next three nights. after the three nights, there is the funeral. we have to wear a really weird white hat cuz we're family and the white stuff ppl wear is according what they are in the family. for example, my dad wore a thing that looks like what shepherds wear.then after few speeches, we drive out the car to a empty space, and burn paper and most of my grandpa's cloth and the funeral decoration things in his honor. the wind made me felt like i was in the north pole -_- then some of the family members had to go with him to get his body....idk wat its called but his body turn into ashes. the day after we bring the box with his ashes and put some food in front of it and say our blessings to him.& the last step which we havnt done yet is to spread his ashes someewhere. Yeah, its complicated alrite compared to western funerals

R.I.P Grandpa

Today, my grandpa passed away..altho we were not close and he didnt like to talk much, still, once someone is gone,u'll never get them back. When i hugged my dad after he heard the news, his facial expression was really heart breaking, it made me feel something i never felt before.

We booked a flight right on the next day for the funeral..i also realize that this is the first funeral that im gonna attend. So by tommorrow night, i'll be back at XingJiang. its gonna be freezing ><

After something else that happened today, i realized something. There are always gonna be people that walked into ur life who are always gonna be irreplaceable, there are also people u thought that were irreplaceable but in fact they can be replaced, and there are those u know for sure are replaceable. Family is irreplaceable no matter what, and things like boyfriends & such, u'd think that their irreplaceable but believe me,most are.

Who knows what the future holds, Que Sera Sera (:

p.s Grandpa,hope u rest in peace in what i hope is heaven. Before your death, im not sure if u believed in God or not. just a week ago my mom was trying to get our other relatives to believe and then speak to u about God. unfortunately, all they did was laugh(which made me mad cuz its as if they take God as a joke) Im sure everyone has a time where they would have to go but i hope by some miracle u believe in Christ before u left this earth. R.I.P

Living Hell

You see this guys?? dont ever complain to me about ur hw issues nooo more ! there's always someone suffering more than u & that person is me. This gigantic stack of shit doesnt even include my textbooks!! its just folders that contains millions of worksheets, notebooks, and workbooks. & NOT ALL OF IT EITHER! THERES MORE IN MY BOOKSHELF! -_- now u know my pain, stop complaining, being a student in China =Hell

The stuff animal kidnapper is out there!

So omg, it happened again, i swear someone is stealing stuff animals left outside people's doors around here. So the dumbohead left me presents outside my door again, i used to think it was cute but now..ehh,cuz stuff gets stolen and it makes me more mad than happy. I mean he used to put cookies,chocolates,and other food but nobody ever took those, only stuff animals.It happened on Christmas too, when my Snowman was kidnapped, now my Stuffed bunny is kidnapped T_T people these days.....LOL, funny thing is they left the roses untouched. I mean the first time, i guess people could have just assumed someone didnt want the stuff animal anymore so they put it outside the door, but isnt it common sense to know that if a stuff animal is put beside a bunch of fresh roses, it was probably meant for someone?? in only an hour period of time, it was gone, LOL, i gotta say tho, whoever took it got ninja skills.

smells like my conditioner (;

Jealousy

Jealousy is like a disease, it adds up day by day until it finally turns into an uncontrollable bitch. everytime i see her, i glare at her, i wanna sock her in the mouth,i wanna hurt her. i talk an awful lotta shit about her and my expression changed everytime i see her. & then suddenly i ask myself, when did u turn into such a bitchy person, when did ur heart become so full of hatred?when did u turn into someone u once looked down apon? and then i realize i have made so many enemies all cuz of one guy , is it all worth it? is he really worth fighting for? NO so...
i needa just chill and stop letting it get to me.

i think its time to get on with my life..

Words

Okay so enough with pictures.

So i know our parents loves us and wants the best for us but i hate it when they treat me like i'll never grow up. Today was the last day of our finals, meaning...HELL IS FINALLY OVER! & lets face it, my two weeks of being single and not talking to him is getting me in a depressed mood. so i just wanted to go out and watch a movie at night. the theater is like right next to school and i was just ready to go out when she told me NO. no is the word i hate most out of the english dictionary, no doesnt cut it, so i argued. why? becuz im in a bad mood & i just really wanted to find a way to let out all the bad energy inside me. Yeah it was dark, yeah it was cold, yeah she didnt want me to get in an accident or something, but i guess i just didnt care at that time.

Now i guess she was right, but i cant help it, i dont wanna keep all these emotions bottled up and i dont want her to treat me like im some lil kid no more!

ughhh...& switching to the topic of fatherly love. well in chinese, they say that "the father's love is like the mountains, and the mother's love is like the water in the springs" i guess im always gonna be more affectionate to my mother as well, and to me honest , i dont really like my dad always around either, but in my heart i still love them both. Because sometimes love, is hard for a guy to show to someone, and our fathers is no different. so we should be more understanding..cuz i dont think its possible for a father not to have love for his own child unless there's something wrong with his head .

Most common winter outfit

LOL, again with the scarf, i know

Short hair once more

BTW! if u havnt noticed i cut my hair! ;D
yeah, with this haircut, i think u can go for the cute look, or the really mature look.
BEFORE:

AFTER:

Look how mushroom-ish it looks ;p

& this is a pic from two years ago! not good quality cuz a friend took a webcam pic of me & i took a pic of that on the screen LOL

Lala

these are my mom's old earrings and i absolutely fell in love with them!

heres me wearing them, god they made me look a bit too mature ><

FAVORITE NOTEBOOK OF ALL TIMES, like no kidding !

Did i mention my crazy obsession with scarfs, i've been collecting em like crazy && i have worn a scarf with my outfit everyday since winter! LOL, to me, a scarf and make or break an outfit, & i love it cuz its soooooo warm ! ^^

& i wear this everyday too! more warmth and fuzzyness, yay! ^^